Briana at the U of M Medical Center days before she passed through the door to her new life Some of her family and friends kept constant vigil at the University of Minnesota Medical Center for five days and nights. We watched over her, cared for her, prayed for her and took care of countless details on behalf of her and her son, Jahmari, age 10.
We learned over the course of days that her cancer had spread like wild fire throughout her body giving her and her doctors no chance of overtaking it. She believed her God was bigger than the cancer. Her faith made it so difficult to grasp that she had worldly things she needed to tend to. It was a dilemna that was hard to reconcile. Why did her faith and real life seem so far apart? Would it mean she didn't believe strongly enough if she took steps to deal with life after death here on earth?
I am left with many questions. I am left with no immediate answers. I am left with unshed tears because of what I experienced in that hospital over so many days and nights. I am left with exhaustion and more miles to travel before this new road reaches a place of rest.
Each time I looked in the mirror at the hospital at a face that hadn't been washed for days and a body that had not slept for nights, I simply said.......
"You can do this. You CAN do this. You can DO this. YOU can do this." And, I did. And, I wish I had not had to.
I love you Briana, and I will miss you. I do miss you.
May you rest in peace in your new heavenly home and it was an honor and a privilege to be part of your journey home.
Love,
Judy
26 comments:
It's hard to believe. Such a beautiful picture. Amazing how quickly her health detiorated. She looks great in that picture! Very nice post Mom.
So sad, so sad, you wrote this with great love for this girl Judy. Thank you for posting. Her journey to us...Hugs June
Judy- you and your family were with her- and that is all that you could do-she went in peace with her family by her side. We cannot understand these things that happen to us and our families-but there is a reason and it is in our Masters plan. Maybe someday they will find a cure for this dreaded disease called cancer-until then all we can do is regular check-ups- Thinking of you Betsy
Oh my. Being a part of Briana's journey is both a blessing and a opportunity for many questions. I will continue to keep all of you in my prayers.
Judy- you and your family were with her- and that is all that you could do-she went in peace with her family by her side. We cannot understand these things that happen to us and our families-but there is a reason and it is in our Masters plan. Maybe someday they will find a cure for this dreaded disease called cancer-until then all we can do is regular check-ups- Thinking of you Betsy
Oh Judy, honey, ouch ouch ouch.
I'm so sorry, like, unimaginably sorry.
If there is something that would help let me know......and put your mind in places where the light dwells and warmth. You gotta take care of yourself.
I read this passage from a radio program I subscribe to on the internet called "Hearts of Space" (www.hos.com) . Its free on Sundays if you ever want to check it out....I think you would love it. Anyway, one program was called "Transparent Spring" and this is what the author wrote about the music program...
"The transition between winter and spring is never predictable. After a time of darkness and confinement, we long for light, air and freedom. We seek change: space and openness, movement and flow.
Filled with new purpose, we clean out old structures. In uncertain times, we shine the light into dark places, and we prepare for the challenges ahead. Transparency is the new watchword, the key to trust."
You know as I do, she isn't gone forever, she's just gone ahead. You live your life the best way you know how, Judy-- and know that you are loved.
Keep in touch,
Laura
So, so sorry Miss Judy. If anyone has the faith to survive, overcome and understand, it is you.
Miss Kelly
Dearest Judy,
I am so, so sorry that Briana has left us. But, as you must know from the many years you have lived and spent helping people, she is not really very far away.
My heart breaks for you and all who loved her...
Mary Pat
Thank you Judy
Isabella
It is hard to see beyond our grief and the questions that accompany the passing of a loved one. It is hard to stand there and watch them take that final journey to the other side. Yet, so many souls make that journey suddenly and alone.
God decided that it was time to bring Briana home but in doing so, he gave her loved ones the opportunity to accompany her to the door beyond which it is not yet our turn to enter. You were able to take her by the hand and leave her in the care of those waiting at the other side. You must now live in the knowledge that all things are now clear to Briana. All her questions and feelings – the why’s and the wherefores – have been answered.
God has given all of you, Briana’s family and friends, the privilege to take her on that last journey and bear witness to the miracle of the events of her last days in this life. It wasn’t to be the miracle we all prayed for but miracles come in different ways.
Briana is now at peace and watching over all of us.
I have my own special memory of Briana. I met her once. She walked before me as we left a restaurant where we had all shared a wonderful evening that Adam had arranged last summer. As she entered her vehicle, she turned around and as she said goodbye to me she gave me a marvellous hug. That hug lives in my mind as a gesture of acceptance and welcome into your marvellous family. It remains a fond memory for me.
“She has shed the surly bonds of earth and touched the face of God”.
My heart goes out to you all Judy.
Sorry to hear of Briana's passing.
A loss to earth, a great asset in Heaven. She is now an angel to you all.
We cannot live in panic and fear, just faith and hope. God is good and when we all realize we are not
really in control, it's God driving the car.
Love and heartfelt sympathy to you all at this time of loss and sadness. May all the fond memories of her help ease your grief.
Her life legacy will live on in all who knew and loved her!
Cathy B.
I WAS SO SORRY TO HEAR THIS, JUDY, I KNOW ITS HARD TO DO BUT YOU MUST LET HER GO TO THE OTHER SIDE. I STRONGLY BELIEVE THERE IS A LIFE AFTER DEATH, AND BRIANA WILL BE HAPPY AND FREE FROM PAIN..JUST THINK, SHE WILL BE LOOKING AT YOU, AND SAYING, PUT A SMILE ON THAT FACE JUDY. SO SMILE FOR HER JUDY OK ...
A LITTLE POEM FOR YOU LUV IN YOUR SORROW....
SOME TIMES WE HAVE TO LET OUR NEAREST GO
THE ONES WE LOVE SO MUCH
NEVER AGAIN TO SEE THEM
OR SEE THEIR TENDER TOUCH
BUT GOD TAKES THEM TO ANOTHER PLACE
AWAY FROM PAIN AND FEAR
AND IF THEY COULD WRITE A LETTER BACK
IT WOULD BE JUDY, IM HAPPIER HERE........
LOVE FROM CHERRY.... TO JUDY IN HER SORROW..... XX
Please accept our sympathy and prayers. So hard to see young people leave us. Nice you spent time with her. Did you read HER the Velveteen Rabbit?
Peace
Love Pam
Judy
Very nice.
s
Dear Judy, Although I didn't know Briana, your words have brought an endless stream of tears. I will continue to pray for her family. Kathy
Judy,
So sorry for your loss.
Theresa
I have thought about Briana so much in the last few days knowing what you are going though. She was very brave and so were you. I didn't know Briana personally but felt the love that was given her in her last days.
Judy,
I am so sorry to hear the sad news about Briana. We never know what is around the corner.
My eldest son David got out of hospital today after treatment for a large cyst attached to his pancreas. It was a real worry when he lost weight and took so ill. we were fortunate. I can only imagine what you must have gone through.
My prayers are with you
Lots of love
David
Judy,
What a touching blog entry. It truly represents the push/pull of an early death and your deep faith. I pray that you will recognize God's care and love as you and your family continue this journey.
Your love, kindness and faith is inspiring.
Thank you for sharing.
I'm very sorry for your pain and loss.
Marianne
Hi Judy:
This is such a shock as I'm sure it was to your family and Briana's family.
My Deepest Condolences to You, Your Family and all of Briana's family. We will never understand why God always takes the good ones.
Take care of yourself.
Hugs Lynda
Hi Judy,
We could scarcely believe that it happened so quickly.
Anyhow we are still saying a prayer for yourself and all
the rest of the family who are now grieving.
I feel you must stay strong Judy for Briana and those
left behind and God will take care of you all in his own
way which is obviously what Briana believed in.
Our thoughts are with you all the time.
Love : Kathleen and Neil.
Judy... I was so sorry to hear that Briana didn't make it. I know how much we all prayed for her but I guess God decided differently... My thoughts and prayers are with you at this very sad time in your life and hope that time will help to heal the big void it has made . Hugs... Claire (Aurora)
To dear Judy
I send sincere sympathy to your sister and to all the family and her little grandson at this very sad time. Our prayers and thoughts are with you all.
Love to every one
Peggie
Such a moving blog Judy. Another Angel in heaven. Condolences to all the family, and may guardian angels surround her dear son.
Prayers will be sent from England to the people left grieving.
Elizabeth
Hi Judy~
I’m so sorry to hear about Briana. I was really praying for that miracle with you. You are in my thoughts and prayers now as you process your grief and try to heal. If there’s anything I can do to help please let me know.
Love,
Katie
Following Briana's journey and the intense love that surrounded her during her final days here on earth is beyond inspiring and thought-provoking. I am grateful to you, Judy, for sharing this journey with those of us who have never met Briana. I feel like I knew her and wept when I heard that she had moved on - away from all those who loved her so mcuh. What beauty and joy to have known such a special soul in this lifetime. You are all blessed for having had her in your lives. And those of us who didn't know her are blessed for having learned her story. This is a story of inspiration and strength. And I'm a better person for having heard it. Thank you for bringing it to us. Love, Susan
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