I feel better today, but I have spent the last five days doing nothing. I got worn out walking up the stairs so I rested. I didn't feel like eating much so I ate what sounded palatable and looked like I could at least swallow. I took some time to cry. I cried for many things. I let the tears flow from my eyes and words I didn't know were there be said.
There is healing happening. You think if you can get through something, it won't catch up with you. That's not true. Whatever you don't have the time to feel or take the time to feel will eventually find you.
I am glad I had the time to do what I needed to do and dared to do it. Some feelings hurt. They hurt to have them...they hurt to feel them...and if you do, they get better. I prayed to God through my tears. He said it was ok to weep. He said He weeps too.
I feel better.
It is a new year. I don't know all that is in store for me this year. I know there are many good things as I start this year. I am grateful for Sarah being cancer free and returning to her old self as time goes along. I am grateful for my dad being ok. I know we are going to be able to see Adam, Sara Beth, Joseph, Kallsen and Parker this summer if all goes according to plan. We are going on a one year cancer free celebration cruise in March and there will be other life altering things coming up I know. All of them will be faced with new wisdom, new breath, new eyes, renewed courage and less innocence.
The last two days I have found some new life in doing slideshows of photos set to music. The one I am sharing today is of my dad's 98th birthday party in September 2010.
I hope you enjoy it. It has a lovely ending.
I love you Dad! Thank you for being my dad! xo xo xo
14 comments:
Very nice, YOu're right - the ending is lovely!
Wow. Just wow.
It doesn't matter how many times I hear Grandpa sing that, I always love it!
And I am definitely cutting my hair!
Judy, it seems rather ironic, that whenever I think the light at the end of the tunnel is so dim, there you are with all your wisdom, and words that I get so much encouragement from. I try to find words to thank you, but I guess simplicity is the only way, Thank You so much. God Bless You JUDY, hugssss Bill
Wonderful post. Sarah's message is incredible. So glad your Dad is well. Mine will be 86 in March. Blessed to have him.
Take care.
Lois
Very Nice, Judy! Have a Happy New Year! Fawn & Dan too
Just a note to say I understand all of the feelings catching up with you. It happened to me and not just one time. Your slide show was great and I am happy to hear your Dad is doing OK now. Take care and enjoy that cruise. Judy
Judy, What a precious Dad you have!!! I enjoyed this so very much, reminds me of my dad he was 96 when he pass away. Your Dad has no wrinkles, doesn't look that old. I miss my Dad so very much, he was such a southern gentleman. Thanks for sharing.
Judy,
Your reflections are so beautiful.
I thank you for again so candidly sharing your life.
It's a beautiful story with all it's charm mixed with human emotion both happy and sad.
You have such a close, loving, and warm family. It's a rich blessing.
I look at what you have with your children and grandchildren and feel a warmth and love that inspires all whom you touch.
Happy New Year!
Love, Susan
Thank you for sharing your family w/me...
I have this special feeling come over me when I hear your dad sing. It makes me go back to feeling like a little girl. I'll say it again, over and over, he's so amazing! What a lovely ending...
BUG HUGS
Hello Judy,
Thanks for sending the link again, I had lost it and your email addy too when my puter crashed again recently, its the pits when that happens.
I had missed your blog posts but had seen all but this last one, and you write so very nicely and with so much feeling, I always have tears....
I loved the slide show of your dads birthday, what a special thing, and he looks so good yet for his age too.
I can see why you're so very proud of your family, we do have alot in common there. What would we do without them? I dont want to know!!!
Again, thanks for sending, I appreciated it, hugsssssssssss, Lila
Welcome back to blogging and thanks for sharing your video and your family.
And your dad's singing is very precious.
Esther
Happy New year to all the family Judy …
Lovely blog as usual ... such warmth and happiness at last …
God Bless xxx
lisa uk
Dearest Judy,
I'm so glad I know you. You are an inspiration! You'll never know how much just reading your words makes me feel connected!
The video is FANTASTIC!!! Good Job!!! It gave me a whole new perspective on the song, "How Sweet It Is to Be Loved By You!"
HAPPY NEW YEAR, JUDY!
Love,
Mary Pat
Somehow I missed this addition to your blog completely and just read it. Loved the slide show Judy and you have to heal yourself before you can help others, so your retreat was necessary. You needed to cry and reflect and now you move on. So many good things are going to happen this year for you and your family.
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